Hot Debate: Is It Better To Be A Man Or A Woman?

They say it’s better to be a man than a woman. It’s so bloody true. There’s so many reasons to support this argument and all are perfectly valid too:

1. Men Can Piss Standing Up

This a a bloody good thing if you really think about it. Just unzip and piss whenever and wherever you want with absolutely no mess. Well, at the end there might be that little shake off but that’s nothing compared to undressing a quarter of the way, wiping the toilet seat off before using it. It’s a whole ritual men don’t need to do. And don’t even get me started on women pissing outside - it’s quite a mess!

2. Most Men Do Not Need To Wear Make-up

This is another obvious advantage of being a man. It saves us an awful lot of time to spruce ourselves up to prepare ourselves for the world’s viewing. It also saves us tonnes and tonnes of make-up money. Of course some men do wear make-up but it takes an extraordinary kind of man for that.

3. Men Are More Efficient With Clothes and Shoes

This is linked to reason #2 above. We don’t need all the time in the world to get dressed. We just need our pants, jeans, a nice t-shirt, socks and trainers. No fancy clothes, no time wasted arguing about which matches what and most of all no big decisions. All we have to do is toss it and go! It also saves us loads of our beer money.

4. Men Are Taller

This one is quite simple really. We can reach loads more things higher up, like in shops with higher shelves. While it’s true there are taller women like in Germany or Holland where women average 5′8″. But anybody will tell you that no women can jump …. as high as men!

5. Men Are Stronger

This is so true. Men are generally physically and, usually, mentally stronger than women. We can lift stuff they can’t and do all those nifty things such as open jars easily. Of course there are a couple of women that are as strong as or even stronger than men but they are an extremely rare breed indeed.

6. Men Do Not Worry About Their Looks

Men don’t stare at themselves in mirrors for ages just to spot a pimple or wrinkle. We don’t have to worry about getting old either. When women hit thirty, they whine about their age and start lying. Not us men! We answer without a thought when asked about our age. We men also don’t sit about worrying if our bums are too big and we can even talk to other men and joke about it hahaha.

7. Men Are Better Cooks

Contrary to the popular belief that women are better cooks than men, who’s the best, biggest and most famous chefs? Men! We’ve got Gordon Ramsay, Jamie Oliver, that greasy-haired French bastard and many more. Women are trying to catch up with Nigella Lawson but cooking is still largely a man’s world.

8. Men Have Fewer Orgasms

Hang on, I know women are asking ‘how is this an advantage?’. Simple! We have one, or rarely two, orgasms and we’re spent! Sex is finished and we’re back to work. Women have one orgasm and keep wanting more, more and more. They also want to cuddle afterwards. In my book, it’s a complete waste of time. We just sort it out and forget it. Twenty minutes and we can do other productive things for the rest of the day.

9. Men Do Not Have Periods

This is one of the biggest reasons why being a man is so much better. Men don’t get extra wacky 3 or more days per month and get headaches, cramps or fits of frustration without reason. Men also don’t need to buy stupid tampons or any of those disgusting things specifically designated as hygiene products.

10. Men Do Not Get Pregnant

This is the number ONE advantage of being a man. We do not get pregnant! Wooooohooo! Yes mate, enough said, let’s get a pint!

Is it better to be a woman than a man? Absobloodylutely! In response to Mr Blue’s argument, here’s my reasons to disprove all his illusory comments.

1. Women Piss Sitting Down

You might ask how this is an advantage. Really simple. Women get to relax for 5 or 10 minutes and sit down while they pee. Men usually have to stand. It’s highly unfair, I’m telling you. Not fair!

2. Women Are Way Easier on the Eye

Hardly anybody, male or female, will disagree with this. Women have much nicer curves and no ghastly, unwanted, cylindrical appendage protruding from the body. We’ve just got one sleek, aerodynamic curve. Women have got nicer legs and their butts are far from hairy too!

3. Women Are Shorter

This is so good because women ain’t got as far to bend down just to reach the floor. As a result, we can better spot loose change on the ground. We can also do the sexy limbo dance better. And don’t forget those shorter doorways. Yes, women are so bloody lucky!

4. Women Are Weaker

Now I assume most of you might be confounded by this one. The logic is rather simple. Because women are weaker than men, guess who is made to do all the heavy lifting and body-breaking work? Men of course! Why do women live longer? Because women use their apparent weakness as a perfect excuse to let stupid men do the physically intensive labour. See how lucky and clever women are!

5. Women Wear Make-up

Women get to buy loads of lovely make-up and accessories. It’s so much fun using all those nifty gadgets. Make-up also makes women feel pretty, oh so pretty! Ok, enough of that!

6. Women Need Expensive Fashion

This is a major advantage. It’s possible for women to change their outfits more than 10 Mr Potato sets and 30 accessory gift sets combined. Did you know Einstein had 10 identical suits so he wouldn’t have to choose? Confucius even said, “more choices are better!” and everyone just couldn’t agree much more!

7. Women Have More Orgasms

Hmmm, enough said!

8. Women Cook More

While men might be better chefs, far more women cook at home, where they ain’t working. Women let their male counterparts be the cooks at work because it’s WORK, while they’re master of their domain i.e. the kitchen at home. Women are a street better at it and let’s face it; men can never live on pot noodles, steaks or hot dogs alone!

9. Women Have Periods

This is simply amazing! Women have a perfect excuse to be themselves three days per month. During this time, they are allowed to be angry, moody or anything they want to be and everyone will just back off. When men do this, they’re labelled grumpy or crazy!

10. Women Can Be Bisexual

This is a bloody wicked one. I’ve heard somewhere that over 70% of women are bisexual. This is a great advantage over men! Men caught looking at other men’s bums are often singled out but women can stare at other women’s or men’s bums without anybody giving it a single thought. Also, women can be cruder without it being labeled sexual harassment. After all, our society doesn’t shun 2 women together as much as it does to men.

What about you? What’s your take on the debate? Let us know your thoughts!

10 Ways to Heal Your Broken Heart

It’s like there’s no tomorrow, you feel you wouldn’t be happy again, you are terribly stuck with the awful moments when your heart was deeply wounded like it’s the end of the world and they keep haunting you day after day. However, it’s your choice to either be the same person you used to be or perpetually be plunged into the thought of the one you love the most but she never knows or even cares. There is a saying ‘Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional’. Here we list the 10 best ways to heal your broken heart, make your choice and cheer up mates!

1. Dating someone new

Someone says it’s somewhat unfair on a new girl if you go for a new date right after a broken heart, so you’ve got to be sure you have a bit of a crush on her or at least feel she’s special to you. When you’re dating the new one, you’ve got her to talk to and this can stop your mind wandering around. The date will light up your life, she makes your heart pulse and you are being revitalised.

2. You’re too precious

You’d better praise yourself for being too precious for that kind of girl. She just doesn’t deserve a great man like you and you both were totally mismatched. As she neither valued you nor treasured your love, do not waste your time mourning. Keep your head held up high and you will completely get through this suffering and pain. There’s a priceless saying which I came across on the internet “If you can’t save the relationship, at least save your pride.”

3. Keep yourself busy

Find something to do, keep yourself busy with it and you will have no chance of being obsessed with your ex. You might join the college activities, sports club, shopping or anything you find interesting. Despite the fact t